Super Rant from Hell

Life is like the West World movie. Walking around and constantly second-guessing everyone I see, "Is that one real?" I'm running my finger along the handrail in Flag where Route 66 goes under the tracks. It’s raining out, or snowing lightly, and the handrail is moistened and flat; my finger is leaving a straight line all along it and I'm thinking to myself, "there's as much point to this as there is to anything else in my life ... " I came up with a true-to-my-heart philosophy (finally).

Every once in a while you get a breath of fresh air so clean it actually gets you high, and every so often you feel something so right and beautiful that all you can really do is cry; the rest is weirdness and bullshit.

I’ve been wanting to spill out my shpill on that most dirty word that's been skated around now for far too long, even as I've noticed amongst those who may possibly adhere to it or some semblance of it and especially amongst those who have absolutely no clue as to what it is but seem to have developed some kind of very real and intense aversion to its presence in any way even if only by a simple symbol, black and white... To start off with, there are no two explanations the same - and that is precisely what it’s all about. To push any sort of belief structure upon anyone else in any way even remotely by force is the only sin, whether by flat out lies or sneaky manipulation, threats or coercion, broken promises or lost commitments, assumptions or expectations or a loaded gun to the head.

Community is an island in the setting sun. Competition, status, image and bullshit are the bottom lines for everyone. The only reason for anything is meaning. Life sucks. I don't just say that as a passing comment on reality. I mean it whole-heartedly and sincerely and genuinely- three absences that I believe all of us feel to a certain extent and secretly yearn to fulfill. Well, that's how I fulfill them. I believe whole-heartedly and sincerely and genuinely that life sucks. Well, not life so to speak, but what most of us now consider to be life - the real world as they say - this reality that includes a million versions of sick and disgusting, many disguised as things to be desired, necessities or unavoidables - but all just sick and disgusting. I hate every bit of it, through and through, to the core. This reality is rank! That's to say it has been rotting for some time now. I'm pretty sure that there's not one of us that has a clue as to what life should really be like. I move we scrap it all right away without giving it a second thought, before any logic kicks in, no matter what it takes. There is no point anymore. Everything in this reality contributes to misery and suffering. I welcome the expected disasters of [insert the next impending doomsday]. But be careful with those readily available expectations. They can go either way. You can bring something into creation from nothing with an expectation or you can smother it to death.

I saw your missing pet poster and just had to call you. I didn't find your dog, but I think I just might have something even better to offer. Imagine if you could feel like that all the time, or maybe not all the time necessarily, but at least most of the time - or for God's sake l'd settle for half of the time- but without the dependence on that furry little animal or your wife or your boyfriend or your favorite drug or the rosy red lipstick or the brand new car or the note from your lover or the approval of your parents or the sermon in your church or the promotion at work or the grade in your class, or the sweet tasting candy - but just offered freely by life. Imagine being satisfied ... whoa ... that may be too much just yet. Better put it on the back burner for a while. Best watch that it not burn. Sorry your dog's gone, that's a real bummer. Buck up though, it's all good.

So back to the discussion of that anomaly of a four letter word that I almost don't dare to write for fear of the possibility that (if your still with me this far) you'll drop this and allow some programmed reaction to dictate and censor what is accepted as a possible, even remotely possible, viable alternative, but oh well here goes everything, ANARCHY. It's nothing but a word, don't get so upset… a simple written and spoken symbol of an idea that has absolutely nothing to do with the way it sounds when you speak it or the way it looks when you write it. It's meaningless really. And if you think it’s something that's been told you by another then scrap it. For me the premise is that each and every one of us, and that's not intended to be a human-centered notion of the word 'us' or even limited to a popularly accepted belief of what 'life' is, but everything more accurately perhaps, has its own completely unquestionable one hundred percent valid version of the truth and all that that entails. I don't think that anarchy is a philosophy that can be described as a philosophy. I think anarchy is a philosophy which claims that there is no philosophy that could ever be applied in the sense that one applies something to another because that would require compliance and that is definitely not what it is about. I think anarchy defies all else and leaves your slate empty to start again, void of the preconditioned reactions to all the brainwashing stimuli that encompass most of our attention and thus our waking and non-waking realities. For me, anarchy is the idea that says there is no idea but whatever you come up with on your own that is really going to carry any meaning capable of fulfilling or satisfying your needs. Anarchy is the belief that it’s never too late to start over again.

And for community? Well, community is the space that allows for release, that allows for validation, that allows for all that I've described as anarchy. And that which makes this seemingly impossible and easily written off as some unattainable "utopia" for lack of creativity and self-worth and self-love ... that which makes this possible is solidarity. Solidarity is basically a reciprocal version of anarchy- the mirror image of anarchy, the reflection of anarchy ... it reflects anarchy and is OK with that. You see, it’s different and it’s OK. It accepts, supports, validates and welcomes even as it may nullify or bring about some painful accommodation or rearrangement of a base so solidly founded that all there is left to do is blow it out all together and make room for another form or version so foreign as to instinctively inspire fright or reservations but only of that fucking image in the mirror that really has no problem with being a reflection, an exact opposite, reversal, turn around look behind you and don't be surprised if everything has changed and don't ever be so foolish as to tell yourself that everything or anything has not changed in the time it took you to turn around and see that it had. Education is the easy one, any realization, inspiration, insight, change for good or bad, action or action of inaction, but anything whereby accommodation or rearrangement is freely allowed or self-forced or slid into without noticing but always will manifest as some sort of change from whatever it was before. Empowerment is ultimately, as is education, something experienced inside privately and thus hard to convey. Empowerment is the belief, complete with faith and all, that one is capable of implementing some sort of change, no matter how large or small, upon the outer world that encompasses our individual lives and has more effect on us than we can conceive of. Empowerment is the realization that that all encompassing version of reality that we all want to change so badly really doesn't exist and any effect that we may claim it has had on us is actually a cop-out, an excuse for behavior we're not willing to claim as our own. Empowerment comes through education, any realization, inspiration, change for good or bad, action or action of inaction, accommodation for new ideas or rearrangement of preconceived ones.

Peace is what results when all of these ideas and yours too are allowed to be put into practice or at least tried out freely and fully, and ecology is the environment in which it happens which includes not just other things but the relationship between all of those things, the gives and takes, offerings and acceptings, backs and forths, the conveyance of the images that are forever being shot out at each other and to all ends of the universe with every thought and action in all modes physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. (If you are not satisfied in any way with any of these definitions in part or in whole then let your opinion be known. Otherwise, your opinion will never really matter.)

ORGANIZE It’s as simple as Nike would have you believe. Just do it! If it is you that sees it needs to be done then you are probably the best one for the job. Just do it! (If you see that it needs to be done and it doesn't get done then it’s you that didn't do it.) Just do it! No one else sees it the way you do and no one else can do it like you. Just do it! Don't wait for the asking, don't cut yourself short waiting for the invite. Just do it! Don't do it for anyone else and don't just do it for yourself, don't do it for the reaction and don't do it for the reward. Just do it! Listen to your heart if you are confused, maybe you need some relief to be able to hear but just do it! Go out and do it! No one else is going to do it for you. ORGANIZE! Just do it!

Just wandering around looking for signs of life. When you do what's expected of you, you’re selling yourself short in some way or another. But you gotta compromise some of the time right? Isn't life just a series of compromises when you really get down to it? Well if you’re satisfied with that then let me be the first to sign your yearbook. Have a nice life.

What would cause an entire race of beings to voluntarily take part, indeed to work diligently and earnestly towards the aim of bringing about its own destruction? We've been coerced into willfully participating in our own multi-faceted collective suicide. Every level of our existence is filled with ritualistic patterned behavior that has at its core only one perceivable objective: to destroy everything that is beautiful, to relinquish life, to smother creativity, to ignore the truth that is felt at least once by everything I believe; felt maybe just once in a lifetime and forever held, grasped, desperately clung to as some distant memory acceptably classified as forever out of reach with some bullshit justification or another, and you know somewhere deep down inside there wherever you've hidden all the meaning that it’s a lie and all you’re really waiting for is release. Now is a good time for widespread rebellion.